


Robbie Roasted

by kooili



Category: Holby City
Genre: F/F, Mashed Potato Ficathon, Robbie the Rooster
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-02 22:42:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14555118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kooili/pseuds/kooili
Summary: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.An excellent philosophy, unless you happen to be an impersonation of a Rooster potato named Robbie.





	Robbie Roasted

The dust sheet covered room was murky, even with the windows thrown open. Robbie wiped the sweat off his brow as he crammed the last piece into a sturdy cardboard box. It didn’t quite fit, the handle of the electric carving knife he had bought on whim last Christmas poking out the top. He winced and rubbed his thumb against the large scar on his palm which was a remnant of his one and only experiment with the boisterous gadget.

He sighed and straightened himself upright. A scar on his hand was nothing considering how his life had been spiralling southwards lately. His retirement from the force was initially exciting but the novelty of not having anything to do was slowly wearing him down. This latest project was a case in point. The house needed a good sprucing up and he had decided to start with the spare room.

Robbie leaned down to pick up the next box but something caught his eye. It was carrier bag, stuffed full and sitting in a far corner. He frowned, edging his way round the various boxes, finally hefting it up onto the top of a plastic storage container to examine its contents. They seemed to be collection of random items - a scarf, a small bottle of perfume and finally a pile of books, several of them hardbacks, at the bottom of the bag.

He recognised them immediately. They had belonged to Serena, little bits and bobs she had left in the flat during their brief dalliance. Robbie dug into the bag and shuffled through the books, pulling them out one at a time, glancing at the covers as he did. He had expected them to be romance novels, perhaps a crime thriller at a push. These didn’t seem to be either. In fact, he observed with furrowed brows, none of the books were familiar to him at all.

_Desert of The Heart. The Night Watch. The Price of Salt._

He stared a little longer but none of the titles rang a bell. They were probably something girly. He shrugged, pushing them back into the bag. The memory of the fiery brunette made him pause, a wry smile stretching across his face. Now that was a woman and a half. It hadn’t worked out between them in the end - there was someone else, she had revealed at his bedside after the cancer scare - and he had been too overwhelmed with relief of his eventual diagnosis to protest. This unexpected stroll down memory lane had him wondering again if that someone else had worked out in the end. Serena was a fine woman and he would certainly not say no to another whirl.

The bag of books abandoned, his curiosity now piqued, Robbie headed into the living room and tapped the keyboard of his laptop which was sitting open on the dining table. He had to search a bit but eventually found Serena’s profile on Facebook. They were no longer ‘friends’ from the looks of it and all that was visible to him was a small profile picture nested within the header at the top of the screen. He stared at the photo for a long moment. She looked a little different, tanned, her hair sprinkled with silver instead of dark brown.

The look suited her, he thought, as he attempted to zoom in for a closer look only to have the picture dissolve into pixelated squares. There wasn’t anything else on the page; she must have just gone friends only.

_I wonder if she’s still at Holby City._

He was about to click into the search box for the hospital’s website when his doorbell rang. Robbie heaved himself upright and plodded towards the front door pulling it open.

“Hi Robbo,” the man in the trademark Royal Mail red greeted him with a smile, “just a couple of letters and this box here.” He leaned over and picked up the heavy looking box, handing it over to Robbie. “Mind the weight.” The ex-policeman nodded and grunted softly as he received the parcel and kicked the door closed behind him. He didn’t remember ordering anything lately. The contents clinked softly as placed the box next to his laptop and started tearing the tape off the top of it.

They were six identical bottles of wine. He pulled one out and examined the label.

_Of course._

He had pre-ordered this months and months ago when Serena had mentioned how the previous vintage was her favourite wine. Robbie had had great plans to surprise her with the gift, hopeful that it would lead to the some extremely bad behaviour after a few glasses. His mind flew back to the picture of Serena from before and Robbie sighed. Too late for all that now. Still, he thought, cracking the cap open as he headed for the kitchen, there was no sense in letting good wine go to waste. He might as well find out if this was as good as Serena said it would be.

*****

The bike skidded to a halt and the lithe rider got off and pulled it up onto the pavement in front of a familiar front door. He didn’t have to check the address since this was the third time this week coming here with the same order. He pulled the usual cardboard box out of his carrier and took the few steps up to the door.

“Pizza delivery,” he called out, jabbing the doorbell.

There was a sound of footsteps, a soft thud followed immediately by a loud curse before the door cracked open.

“The usual for you Mr Medcalf. Extra large stuffed crust meat extravaganza with double cheese and double pepperoni.” He looked him up and down with a slightly disdainful eye. Yep - same shirt as yesterday. And the day before.

Robbie stared back at him with glazed eyes, an empty wine glass hanging loosely in one hand and the front of his shirt splotched with wet, purple stains. His mobile was in his other hand and it slipped out of his grasp, falling with a thunk onto the floor as he reached out for the large square box. The delivery man bent over like a shot and retrieved it, the screen lighting up as he did with a screenshot of Serena’s Facebook picture.

“Nice looking lady,” he remarked, handing the phone back to Robbie. “Girlfriend?”

Robbie replied by mumbling something incoherent and staggering back into the house. The young man shrugged and pulled the door closed as he headed back for his bike. Couldn’t possibly be. There wasn’t a chance that someone as scruffy as him would be with a fine looking woman like that.

*****

Robbie burped loudly, the smell of cheese and onions filling the air immediately. The empty pizza carton lay open on the carpet alongside an empty wine bottle he had knocked over earlier. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, swiping about a few crumbs of crust and meat before rubbing it against the front of his increasingly grimy food and drink stained shirt.

He slopped another good glug of wine from the second, maybe third bottle - who cared? - into his glass, not noticing that a good measure of it was ending up on the table. His eyes, now bleary and unfocused, stared mesmerized at screen of his phone.

Serena Campbell.

At some point through the second slice of pizza he remembered that he had planned to find out if Serena was still working in the hospital. He’d found his answer by the time he polished off his fifth slice. Seemed like she was still a consultant on AAU. He’d squinted at the screen with the staffing list. Co-lead with someone else called… he couldn’t remember, but they had a name that sounded like an animal. Fox. Bull. Something like that.

The phone chirped and a blue notification notice obscured Serena’s face. He swiped to clear it but only managed to open the app the message had originated from. A smiling face in heavy makeup stared back at him. She looked nice enough and at any other given time, he might have been tempted to swipe right and hoped it went better than the twenty odd times before, but not tonight. The woman looked nothing like Serena.

Sweet, gorgeous Serena.

Perhaps it was a wine-fueled impulse but he couldn’t get rid of the increasingly incessant voice in his head telling him that he needed to see her. Another thought blossomed right on the heels of this one. He knew where she lived - of course he did, he had been at her house numerous times - and it was only a short walk away. Even he could manage that in his current state.

Robbie staggered to his feet and weaved across the living room, searching and pulling a thin jacket off a hook by the door. He was about to open the door when another stroke of drunken inspiration struck. He stuttered across the room again and pulled a bottle of wine out of the box.

Wouldn’t do to show up empty-handed.

*****

Robbie stood at the end of street and squinted down the stretch of pavement. He was certain this was the right row of houses. The initial fifteen minutes had now stretched to nearly an hour. The houses looked surprisingly alike in the low evening light and he had had to stop to catch his breath numerous times along the way. He lifted a hand and wiped sweat off his brow, his breathing slowly returning to some semblance of normalcy.

He was barely past the first house on the street when finally, finally, some unseen deity decided to smile on him. He could just about make out her face from where he was but that surely was Serena, climbing out of the passenger side of a light blue convertible. The driver, a tall blonde woman, alighted simultaneously and the pair walked up a short flight of stairs before disappearing through the brick red front door of Serena’s house.

Robbie’s heart soared. Friday night and she was not out on a date, instead spending time with a friend at home. Mr Someone Else must have fallen through after all. Encouraged by this flicker of hope, he quickened his pace and stumbled immediately as his alcohol leaden legs weaved, uncoordinated.

He cursed loudly, the sound echoing in the quiet atmosphere  of the street. Nearby, the light from a living room streamed out of a set of bay windows in the house next to Serena’s, a face appearing from between the newly drawn curtains. Robbie was too distracted to notice, busy with straightening himself up before staggering down the pavement, albeit a little more gingerly than before.

Nearly there.

Another half a dozen steps and he was finally there, in front of the familiar front door. Robbie lifted a hand and was about to knock on it when a slight movement caught his eye. He could see a corner of the living room through a gap in the curtains. Serena and her friend were on the sofa and they were sitting very close together. In fact, they were practically on top of each other and...

Robbie’s eyes bulged out as Serena leaned in and stroked the other woman’s face, the back of her head filling his view as they kissed. He rubbed his eyes - this must be some wine induced hallucination. He staggered back a step, forgetting that he was on the edge of the stoop, his foot meeting thin air. He teetered for a second before falling backwards, bouncing off the steps into the shrubbery next to it.

“Oi, what do you think you’re doing there?” a sharp voice called out. Robbie blinked and looked up from his undignified position between the rose bush and the lilies.

A small woman, hair in curlers with a fluffy dressing gown engulfing her petite figure, was standing beside two men, both clad in dark short-sleeves topped with fluorescent yellow vests.

He sighed in relief, grateful to be in familiar company of fellow police officers. It took a little more effort than expected but he finally managed to extract himself from the foliage and push himself into a vaguely upright position.

“It’s okay, officers. Former police detective here and I’m just visiting a friend.” He signalled towards the front door.

“He was being shifty,” the woman countered. “I’ve been watching him tottering up and down the street for the past half an hour."

Robbie snorted. “My girlfriend lives here. Serena Campbell.”

The officers took in his dishevelled appearance and beer belly poking out from between the food stained shirt and trousers that were now barely hanging round his waist. They exchanged dubious looks and turned towards the woman who was now cackling loudly at Robbie. “Not bloody likely.”

Her face softened as she explained to the uniformed men. “Serena and Bernie live here and they’re a lovely pair of girls. I was at their wedding, you see, and you couldn’t have seen a sweeter couple.”

She turned and glared at Robbie pointedly. “So, if she’s your girlfriend, then I’m the Queen.”

As one of the young uniformed officers slipped the cuffs onto his wrists and began to read him his rights, he was just sober enough to hope they wouldn’t be taking him to his old station. He’d be in for a proper roasting if they did.


End file.
